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A few years ago, I had a public speaking experience that completely knocked me off course.

Not just “I wish I’d done better” badly…more like the kind that gets under your skin and stays there. I walked away convinced that maybe I wasn’t meant to speak at all.

After that, I quietly decided I was done.

When people asked me to speak, I’d say, “Oh, I’m really busy that week,” or “That’s not really in my wheelhouse right now.”

In truth, I didn’t want to feel that kind of vulnerability again. I told myself it wasn’t a big deal. I wasn’t really a speaker anyway. But the longer I avoided it, the smaller my world got.

This year, I got asked to do a keynote.

My first instinct was to say no.

I even started typing out the email. But the topic about teaching students how to network through every phase of their career hit too close to home. I care deeply about helping people learn the power of connection, especially young people who might not have the same access or privilege that others do. Saying no to that felt wrong.

So I said yes.

And then I panicked.

I hadn’t spoken at that level in years, and all those old doubts came rushing back. What if I messed it up again? What if people could tell I was nervous?

So I prepared as if my life depended on it.

I probably put in 40 hours for a one-hour talk. I practiced 20 times, and by the end, I was so sick of hearing my own voice that I could barely stand to play another recording. But when the day came, that work paid off.

When you’ve gone over something that many times, it stops feeling like a performance. It starts feeling like a conversation you’ve already had a hundred times. And that’s what it was - a conversation about something I believe in deeply.

Afterward, people told me how much it made them think about their own networking habits, not just what they teach their students. That stuck with me.

I realized this wasn’t about being a great public speaker. It was about showing up to share something useful that could genuinely help people advance their careers.

That change in my thinking—from performing to serving—is what helped me overcome my own limiting beliefs about public speaking.

I’m not trying to be the most polished or inspiring person in the room. I just want to offer something that might help someone else do their work better.

So if there’s something you’ve been avoiding because it once made you feel small or scared, maybe it’s time to look at it again. Not to prove you’re good at it, but to see who might benefit if you did it anyway.

Sometimes the only way to reclaim your voice is to just show up and think, “This matters enough to try again.”

We ask our clients to stretch beyond their comfort zones every day. What might change if we held ourselves to the same standard?

Let me know what you think, I’d love to hear from you.

Heather

The Coach for Career Coaches

To learn more about me and what I do, visit my website 

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